Return to 1997 CHRISTMAS Index
Return to 1997 CHRISTMAS Index
And now a rather breathless contribution from Lupin who was run to ground in his, I mean her
new home.
"Well Yes! All I can say is.. Well Honestly! It's been quite a year and has taken a while to regain my customary aplomb & I welcome the arrival of 1998 as a year of serenity to relieve the past twelve month's confusion.
I have to say at once that it's not my fault. I , like Sarah, believed what we were told at the petshop, and - oh my- I blush now to think of it. Sarah took me to the vet because she decided to follow advice and have me neutered. I had (ahem) been behaving badly as men do. What could I do?
Bound and bundled in my cage I was transported thither.
I decided my only hope was to look beautiful and good in order to charm the vet into mercy. He was another male after all. To my vast outrage I was scooped up and turned upside down. "No" said the vet, " I can't do it".
This looked hopeful.
"Why not?" demanded Sarah - quite indignantly I felt.
"Well," came the reply, "This rabbit is female."
I nearly fell off the table and Sarah stared open mouthed.
"Look," said the vet, "You know - nothing there"
They held my back legs apart and peered closely. I was heaving with indignation. I tell you candidly, I have never been so humiliated in all my life.
"I hope," said the vet politely, "You didn't want to breed from her?"
Her? Her?
Sarah swept me back into my basket and walked briskly home. She told her boyfriend later, "I have never been so embarrassed in my life."
"That would explain it then" he said - once he stopped laughing. "Must have been its hormones. All those unexplained mood swings. One minute happy bunny, the next the beast is plotting in its cupboard and grinding its teeth."
I was mortified and took myself to my food as my main consolation. Now I have put on weight and suppose as a female will need to diet.
The worst thing Mr Goose has found out and laughs horribly whenever we meet. Worse I failed to stop the house move and now I am a Shed Rabbit. But I suppose I do have the run of the garden all day so its not all bad.
Sarah gave a copy of Germaine Greer - The female Eunuch to chew over and the Spice Girls album. AND I've sorted out the
next door cat. She's too scared to come out of her house now. TEE HEE. Yep, life is looking up. Have a lovely new year and
remember: GIRL POWER. YEAH!