Lupin
found
murdered!

by Sarah Keen

Her owner stumbled across the outstretched body which had been left sprawled across the garden path. It was late afternoon and Lupin was still warm. Apart from the terrible wound in her neck the body was otherwise unmarked. This was cold, calculated killing in almost broad daylight said a spokesperson the next day. We will find the killer.

Wilder rumours that this was a revenge killing aimed at Lupin's owner were swiftly discounted. And the usual suspects were soon investigated as Lupin's lifestyle became clearer. Her own column in the New Millennium hinted at an aggressive background and she had made some enemies along the way.

The local cat community

remained coy and could only be persuaded to speak off the fence.

No - we didn't do it said one. Although we were sorely tempted. That rabbit refused to let us cross the garden even as an access visit to the next door catflap and food supply. She made our life very unpleasant...Anyway, you know, this is not our trade mark killing. When we kill rabbits we eat them at once. Head to toe...miouyum. Only leave the gall bladder behind. We had considered killing the rabbit but not actually got around to it yet. She was quite large after all... Have you considered Mr Goose? They never got on you know and he is a bit unstable...

Mr Goose had an alibi but had to be given water to stop his convulsions of laughter. Oh yes, Oh yes, horrible little creature - nothing but a rat with ears on. Perhaps it was an escaped mink? Fine creatures - far to good for coats I always thought so. What, What?

Despite wide enquiries the mink was nowhere to be found and the pattern of kill was not typical. There seemed to be a conspiracy as each animal pointed away from the real killer - a fox.

Grave robbed

Suspicions that it was a fox were confirmed when a few nights later the rotting body was dug up and partially eaten. This is a signature killing said the investigators and recounted several horrid tales of the murderous fox. Lupin's detached ears were found hopping around the garden by themselves in the high winds. It was Gruesome said the now distraught owner. I never wish to see this rabbit again. I have had to cover her grave with paving stones to keep the fox out. Still, never say die, I might get some good vegetables next year.

Shocked. The owner was astounded to learn later that the fox had been aided and abetted by her neighbour. Intensive questioning forced the woman to reveal that it was only a small fox so I encouraged it into the garden and fed it pizza just as I feed the mice in your shed. Terrific. Pizza and rabbit takeaway palace for foxes then.

Death penalty called for...?

When pressed Lupin's owner said she would waive rights for the death penalty for the fox who was only following its instincts. The neighbour remains a different matter