Moronic chain emails

If there’s one thing that really gets my feathers ruffled it’s those STUPID chain emails people keep sending to my personal, private email address. Ok, ‘no names, no pack drill’ – but you know who you are!

The truth about chain emails…

Well, I’ll let you all into a little secret: they are all lies. No! you won’t be receiving $1000 dollars from Microsoft for sending ‘this email’ to all your buddies. No! the ‘missing child’ isn’t really missing. She doesn’t actually exist. And No! sending ‘this email’ to everyone you know won’t give you eternal good luck. It won’t make you rich or famous beyond your wildest dreams. It won’t make you beautiful or desirable to the opposite sex (or the same sex if that’s what floats your boat). There is no free trip to Disneyland. Nokia and Ericsson are not giving away free phones. No amount of spamming your mates, (or by now former mates) will cure anyone’s cancer, epilepsy or migraines. And it won’t even touch herpes, chlamydia or any of those ‘social diseases’ you may have contracted after a few good nights out on the town.

So please do NOT forward those stupid chain mails to me!

Chain emails are about as welcome here as a dose of the pox! And I have a special message for the spiteful morons who send me those vile ‘you will have a lifetime of bad luck if you don’t pass on this email to all your friends‘ variety. Cobblers! My ‘bad luck‘ is that I might be in some way associated with you!

On a scale of credibility that already dips well into minus-figures, the most moronic of all the chain emails has to be the the exceptionally dumb Sainsbury’s Vouchers hoax that’s currently doing the rounds here in Old Blighty. And hundreds of silly, greedy Brits have actually fallen for it! Hardly surprising I suppose as this lot actually voted again for that mass-murdering, war-mongering, grinning, two-faced shyster Blair, when he really ought to be serving a long stretch in one of ‘Her Majesty’s hotels’ for war crimes!

Anyway, I will be giving you all the full benefit of my opinion regarding chain emails in a later blog entry. Meantime, here are some sites to visit, particularly with regard to the Sainsbury’s hoax. And just to make it perfectly clear even for those with AOL accounts because in my experience, AOLers seem to be a particularly gullible bunch…

NO! Sainsbury’s is NOT going to give you £60 if you send that dumbassed email to ten of your friends.

It is a HOAX!Mr Goose, you don’t actually have 10 friends, do you? Ed.

AOLers and others with learning difficulties should ask a responsible grown-up to read and explain these to you…

Sites specific to the 2005 October Sainsbury’s hoax…
http://www.sophos.com/virusinfo/hoaxes/sainsburys.html
http://www.sophos.com/spaminfo/articles/sainchain.html
http://www.hoax-slayer.com/sainsburys-voucher-hoax.html
http://www.webuser.co.uk/news/69613.html

Recent postings on forums & blogs about the Sainsbury’s hoax…
http://s12.invisionfree.com/HoaxSlayer_Forums/index.php?showtopic=91&view=getnewpost
http://www.rover800.co.uk/e107_plugins/forum/forum_viewtopic.php?2099
http://chris-linfoot.net/d6plinks/CWLT-6HBLDH

People who are as miffed as me with the morons who forward this stupid, obvious hoax. Also, one poster suggests the hoax is actually an email harvesting scam…
http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=104227

Good general reading about email hoaxes…
http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/nothing/billgate.asp
http://www.hoax-slayer.com/

One of the best resources on the web for debunking urban myths
http://www.snopes.com/

Sainsbury’s response to the hoax (go to bottom of their web page)…
http://www.sainsbury.co.uk/shoppingandservices/FAQs/aboutourcompany.htm#100

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